Millionaire Max & Deborah the deliverah by jess

Do you ever feel bipolar?

Today I woke up (reluctantly) to my alarm got ready for work went about my normal routine and wasn't in any particular mood. Then my arch enemy slash co-worker showed up who 1. scares the poop out of my intestines 2. makes me so mad i could poop my pants and 3. makes me cry everyday. It's just her personality it's nothing against her it's just i can never do a dizamn thing to make that woman happy. EVERY breathe is wrong. Anyways back to my bipolar disorder. She was at work today and I was borderline in tears all morning and hiding in the bathroom texting everyone i could think of that would laugh at my rediculous solution to my problem. (Punch her in front of customers get fired not make rent be homeless then go bankrupt and die alone--anxiety much?) One of the people i texted was my roomie and bad ass lifter Alyssa Sulay. Her responce was.. "i'll do it for you i've always wanted to punch someone in the face" and then she said "btw there was a package at the gym for you" It's Christmas time and i live really far aka on the other side of the country away from all my family so i figured maybe someone forgot where i lived or something. no big deal. i went from almost tears and anger to anxious and borderline cheerleader pep happy. I told alyssa to open it right this second i promise to not send her to federal prison for opening my mail. it was a gift from a follower of my blog Deborah! I've seen her funny comments on my twitter (follow me beezy's @jessicamarie979) and we're friend's officially thanks to facebook. I went from borderline cheerleader pep happy to literal psyc ward hyper 3 year  old on crack. I was running all over work doing everyones job i was so happy and smiley and beyond words. I feel so blessed that people like Deborah believe in me and would do such a thoughtful thing. the whole drive home i was definitly not using my phone to write a blog post about how happy and thankful i was and still am now. ( i didn't die on the highway from typing and driving)


OK part two. I'm on crack...should be dead...hyper. I sign on to my blog to write this THANK YOU SO FREAKING MUCH post when... i read a comment from an annonomous person named Max. He donated money to me! Now i'm crying again.


I never like asking for help even from my own parents. i just dont like it. when someone and especially someone you don't know personally reaches out to do something nice for you in general is like the most special thing imaginable. Today i'm at a loss for words. I'm so happy feel so blessed. I'm the luckiest girl in the world. This Christmas was probably the best Christmas i can remember for many reasons. The fact i got gifts (like Taylor Swift concert tickets or the gift from Deborah, or the donation) is a plus, but the fact that i have people in my life that love me and that think of me is enough.


to sum it up... I'm bipolar today. Thank you both so much i cant say it enough. I hope to make you both proud. #teamjess

Fearlessly,
J